Okay, so over the last week all I’ve been hearing are tributes to Paul Gray. For anyone who doesn’t know, Gray was the bassist of Slipknot who died last week of natural causes that somehow happened in the same room as a metric fuckton of pills and syringes. Just saying.
Anyways, his death, much like the death of Jimmy Sullivan from Avenged Sevenfold, was followed by about a trillion facebook status updates about how the metal world has been shaken to it’s very foundations.
FUCK. THAT. SHIT.
Okay, he’s dead. Feel free to be sad about his death. But cut the bullshit about how the world of metal is never going to recover from this loss. He was a shit bassist in a shit band. Move the fuck on. It’s hardly like Slipknot will find it hard to replace him, surely one of their other 27 members can play bass, right? Maybe that spastic who contributes nothing but hitting a keg and running around like a downs kid being attacked by wasps can finally step up to the plate. And for everyone thinking that Slipknot will finally break up (or hoping, in my case) it seems that his death hasn’t affected the way Slipknot conducts themselves, which is making money at every chance they get.
"Throw money at us to pay your respects."
Honestly though, I can’t really blame the fans for acting like his death is going to leave the world a barren wasteland, devoid of what these people think is amazing music. Metal is after all the most pretentious music there is, and this is coming from someone who occassionally listens to it. The average metal fan lives in a fantasy realm of Viking warriors fighting fierce, epic battles against a world of demonic injustice. Expecting them to realize that Slipknot is basically a boyband with poorer hygiene is the definition of “barking up the wrong tree”.
The band will not sound any different without him, unless you consider all the front row dipshits cutting themselves to be a separate instrument. And in a band with this many unneccesary members, you’re unlikely to care.
So, how about you all grow up and reflect on someone far more deserving of your grief.
Dio, stomping everyone's shit as always.
